Forever Finding The Perfect Lad...

[CollectingLooseWords]

Forever finding the perfect lad. That’s me fully taking the piss. That’s never happened.

My track record to date includes psychos, gamblers, drug dealers, drug takers, dads and to top it off, someone who was on the run.

As much as it sounds like a lie and as much as I wish it was, it’s not.

I don’t actually know how I do it, but I always manage to attract the fucked up ones. Obviously I don’t know they’re fucked up when I start speaking to them, but as soon as they show their true colours you’d think I’d stop talking to them. Unfortunately I don’t. Maybe that’s where I’m going wrong?

There’s nothing worse than the lads who try to tell you that you can’t speak to other lads and that they want to check your phone, it’s like hello, we only matched on Tinder 3 days ago… Those ones get pied straight away, I’ve got no time for that shit. It’s like go and sort your fucked up issues out and then come back to me. Either that or just fuck off and ruin some other lasses life. Either works for me.

It’s the ones who tell me they’re banned from driving or on the run because people want to kill them that I find myself involved with. I get way too intrigued. I find a ‘bad lad’ quite attractive, but then sometimes it’s a bit like ‘are you actually taking the piss, how the fuck is this your life?’

It makes it twice as worse when my friends warn me to stay away from someone because it just makes me want to carry on speaking to them even more. Yeah, I know I’m like a 5 year old child who doesn’t listen to their mam but who cares.


One of these days I’ll probably end up in a body bag from meeting a psycho on Tinder, but for the time being I’ll continue to swipe right on strangers and sleep with people on the first date…

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